When something is going right in your life, have you ever begun to wonder when something is going to go wrong or when the “other shoe is going to drop”? I would like to introduce you to the world of self-sabotage. In this brief blog, I will describe what limits you reaching your full potential.
Shockingly, most of us are unaware that we possess a significant level of fear when it comes to success in our lives. According to Gay Hendricks, “Many of our fears are based on the ego, the part of us that’s focused on getting recognition and protects us from social ostracism” (2009). Unknowingly, we all have an internal gauge that tells us how much success, love and creativity one is allowed to accept into our lives. Whenever you start reach past your internal set level, your sub-conscious will try to pull you back into its desired reality. You therefore end up sabotaging your own success.
You see this in relationships all the time -- you find someone who truly loves you, but you may feel not worthy of it. The person will end up running away emotionally or cheating physically, and these are only two examples in this area of life. But this doesn’t only happen in relationships. Maybe it manifests as not finishing song you have written, staying in a job you don’t like, fear of taking chances, even not taking that vacation you’ve always dreamed of. Are you worthy of (fill in the blank)?
Our thoughts trigger our feelings, which turn into actions. The first way to stop self-sabotaging is to first be aware of what you are thinking and acknowledge the thoughts. If you are unaware what you are telling yourself, you will blindly follow what your sub-conscious is telling you. Next, you need to pre-plan what you are going to start telling yourself. Some people call this a mantra. Every time a self-sabotaging thought rises up, you combat it with an alternative thought. What you listen to will affect what you do. We listen to our own voice more than anyone else’s. So be cognizant of what is going on in your head – because it matters.
I hope this helps you reach your dreams!